once you are real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand

I have a fear of fat-phobia. Seriously. It bothers and offends me to no end when others are afraid of overweight people. It worries me that even a good friend of mine can make such an obscene statement as, "oh no, she's ruined... she's fat!" and points to a girl who is probably a size 8 at the biggest. It makes me wonder what she, or others who feel the same, think about me. But I don't care what they, you, her, or him think.

You know, it's not even about being overweight. Some women are just naturally big. I can attest to this myself.. considering all my life I have always been "the fat girl" even though I didn't actually start becoming fat until junior year of high school. I have a round face, I have wide hips, I have thicker thighs... this does not make me 'fat'. Even if I was a size 8, I would still have all of these qualities, it is who I am... how I was built. I love my body's shape, and the curves I have. Sure, I have fat and I am overweight.. and I dislike it. However, it doesn't stop me from loving myself any less. But it's a bit rough when everyone else is trying to use it as an excuse to love me less.

I'm not trying to sound like a victim, because I'm not. There isn't a bone in my body that feels victimized.. because I am the only one in control of how I feel about myself. I just wish society didn't push such strict body image ideals into our brains. I'd really love to work with young girls, and teach them about having self-confidence that doesn't reflect upon what others think of them. There are too many surgeries that occur trying to sculpt the "perfect" body. There are too many girls starving themselves (or regurgitating) just to be 'thin'.

While physical attraction is definitely always the first thing you notice about a person, I don't think it should be such an important factor on what you think about the person. Most of the people I have ever had 'crushes' on were not people I immediately felt attracted to. I am sincerely more interested in a person's personality than anything else. I wish more people my age felt the same!

Overall, I think people also need to learn to find more beauty within themselves. A person's personality has more to it than their skin color, hair, eye color, height, weight, or their style of clothing. There is more depth to a human being than anything your own eye can see. As you age, your body is constantly changing.. and no one is ever promised the same looks. Would you still love someone if their body was burnt entirely in a freak accident?

"Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand"- The Velveteen Rabbit